Help wanted
The Prickly Pineapple is seeking an individual to fill the position of Associate Food Expert.
The requirements of this job are well-defined.
1. Must demonstrate availability to eat with me.
2. Must demonstrate a passion for food of all race, color, and creed. There shall be no dishcover left unturned!
3. Must demonstrate passable conversational skills. Must also demonstrate comfort with silence when one's mouth is full.
Criteria that qualify a candidate for exclusion:
1. Food prejudice. One must always be willing to try at least one bite.
2. A significant other of the jealous type.
Our last Associate Food Expert, Dr. Vita MinA, vacated his position after an inexcusable demonstration based upon prejudice, presumptions, and false accusations. Prior Associate Food Experts have included none less than the likes of Dr. Ragout Lykthasauce, Mr. Evan Chooly, and Mr. Nelson Camodidi. These individuals graciously retired from their positions in answer to other occupational or relational calls leading them to fabulous faraway places. Our interim A.F.E., Dr. Linda Gourmand, admits to lacking an ability to appreciate a full range of fine and familiar foodstuffs, and shall concede her position upon your hire.
O foodie brother, where art thou? For tonight I cravest chicken fried steak.
The requirements of this job are well-defined.
1. Must demonstrate availability to eat with me.
2. Must demonstrate a passion for food of all race, color, and creed. There shall be no dishcover left unturned!
3. Must demonstrate passable conversational skills. Must also demonstrate comfort with silence when one's mouth is full.
Criteria that qualify a candidate for exclusion:
1. Food prejudice. One must always be willing to try at least one bite.
2. A significant other of the jealous type.
Our last Associate Food Expert, Dr. Vita MinA, vacated his position after an inexcusable demonstration based upon prejudice, presumptions, and false accusations. Prior Associate Food Experts have included none less than the likes of Dr. Ragout Lykthasauce, Mr. Evan Chooly, and Mr. Nelson Camodidi. These individuals graciously retired from their positions in answer to other occupational or relational calls leading them to fabulous faraway places. Our interim A.F.E., Dr. Linda Gourmand, admits to lacking an ability to appreciate a full range of fine and familiar foodstuffs, and shall concede her position upon your hire.
O foodie brother, where art thou? For tonight I cravest chicken fried steak.
posted by CamoBunny at 5:58 PM
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